This past month, I had to focus on what I needed. That meant setting boundaries and saying “no” when I didn’t feel like stretching myself too thin. It also meant skipping a few events when I didn’t have the energy to socialize or be around large groups of people. Of course, I felt bad missing special occasions, but I had to remind myself that I was doing what was best for me.

I feel like the overall theme this month has been learning to be more intentional and purposeful. I’ve heard this come up often in my early childhood education classes and in conversations with family and friends, which has been a constant reminder that this is something I need to continue working on.

A few years ago, when I was meeting with my therapist weekly, we talked a lot about mindfulness and focusing on what I can control. Recently, I found myself returning to those practices. I prayed when I felt like I was struggling, I listened to gospel music when I needed to feel uplifted, and I focused on taking deep breaths whenever I felt anxious. I also paused to think before speaking or reacting, and I practiced learning to accept what is, instead of trying to control everything around me. Along with that, I’ve been working on accepting people for who they are, without trying to change them, and leading with more understanding and grace — and trusting that God will open their hearts in His timing.

This month has been a very busy, but all-around exciting month! Between midterms and events, I’m finally getting a chance to journal. Last month, I had a not-so-proud moment and needed a mental reset. Even though there is always something going on in my life, I had to really figure out how to slow down as much as possible and be graceful toward myself and others. Living in a constant rat race can cause stress and irritability, so I needed to be more mindful of what I was doing and how much I was doing.

I needed to reset my mind so I could show up better for the people around me. As a wife, mom, student, and woman, the to-do list is never-ending. I’m learning to give myself permission to slow down and focus on what I can do in the present moment.

I’m also reminding myself that I already have everything I need and that I’m truly blessed. We are often conditioned to always want more in life—which is natural—but it’s just as important to appreciate what we already have. I’ve been learning to find joy even in the simple, everyday tasks like cooking, cleaning, and running errands, and to be present in those moments instead of rushing through them.

Earlier this year, I attended a Rise Up event where a speaker shared something that really stuck with me: “Pay attention to how you speak to yourself in your head.” That advice has stayed with me, and this month I made a conscious effort to speak to myself with grace as I practiced mindfulness. I also focused on being more present as a wife and mom—putting my phone and laptop down during conversations and quality time. I also made time for things I wanted to do, like going on long walks and making meaningful connections, appreciating simple, everyday moments, listening instead of reacting, and slowing down when I felt overwhelmed or rushed.

Mindfulness is something I will continue to practice every day. The small changes I made this month have strengthened my marriage and my family. I’ve come to realize that mindfulness plays a powerful role in our relationships—especially in marriage.

At Bride To Be By Tanya, I believe that the most beautiful love stories aren’t just created on the wedding day, but in the quiet, everyday moments that follow. Mindfulness has reminded me to slow down and truly experience those moments — as a wife, a mom, and a woman continuing to grow. Because when we are present, we don’t just go through life… we actually live it.

If you haven’t already, check out the highlights from the Brownstone Gardens Wedding Fair, the Bridal & Quince Expo at the Royal Banquet, and our Enrichment Drop-Off Night at Zyland — such beautiful and exciting experiences! See these moments and more on my Instagram page @BrideToBe_ByTanya.

Bride To Be Series: Practicing Mindfulness in Marriage and Everyday Life